Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Emo Check #1



I wonder what's behind this heavy feeling I am feeling right now. It all started with the thought of going back to work (Dec. 18 is an island holiday here). Then there was the thought of what wrong could happen today. Bothers me still...must be the residual feeling from last Monday's misdeeds. I'm so pathetic... and paranoid!

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An officemate owed me a little over a hundred worth of cellphone load (income degenerating project ko man ang magpautang load). The last account was made in August, after which she stopped, out of prudence perhaps, considering that she told me she would pay me when she sees me in the office. Well, I've been seeing her every working day since then, placed notes on her desk a couple of times but the payment never came. When we got our year-end bonus, I wrote her another note in bold red, placed it on her desk in the hope that I'd be able to collect from her. Never happened. All I got was silence.
Today, however, I got the shock of my life when she came right to me and handed over crumpled pieces of bills amounting to the worth of the load that she owed me. Finally!
Money is not the issue for me here, but the ill-feeling that I have each time I see her squander the meager resources that she has on non-essentials and still go about her dealings with me as if she owes me nothing. I'm just glad that it's in the past now.

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Missing my son. Savoring the company of the hubby. We banished our son to my mom in Bacolod to get a head start on the holidays. The parting is not as painful as it had been the first time, but when I entered our bedroom all spic and span, I kind of missed all the clutter and the strange noises coming from my squeaky little rascal.

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On the lighter side, the hubby and I was able to enjoy our movie viewing night without interruption. Watched Startdust. Enjoyed watching De Niro don a woman's dress and a heart-shaped faux mole, much so see him in a whoopsie role. I wonder what life would be like if we were like stars; we glow whenever we are encumbered by powerful repressed emotion such as unrequited love. Damo gid mabuking sa aton sini!






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